Listening is one of the most crucial of human abilities. Almost all human functions rely largely on this ability to receive and interpret messages accurately. It is an active process by which we make sense of, assess, and respond to what we hear. It involves understanding of what we hear and processing it further towards acting responsively and appropriately.
Listening is more than just mere hearing. Any sort of sound or verbal information regardless how important becomes an oblivion when someone ceases to really listen to it. Like in- following instruction or taking down notes, participating in simple conversation or class discussion, interacting with others in a game or group dynamics, figuring out if the bus is coming or when the plane has already taking off- mere hearing is not enough; being able to process what is heard to a level of understanding and responding is critical. And this requires effective listening skills. Listening effectively is crucial in maintaining productive relationships. Our socially responsive actions rely heavily on how we accurately process information from our listening to people. If we fail to effectively listen we consequently fail to respond at all, lest act accordingly. Being aware why and when we fail in listening effectively is a jumpstart to honing our listening skills. We must acknowledge that indeed there are factors that hinder us from listening as intently as we should, reasons enough for us to consciously and constantly improve the way we listen. The following are 9 reasons why we fail to listen effectively: 1. message overload – Lots of information are thrown at us daily especially when we drown ourselves into social media. We have to qualify what to listen to and when. We have to filter out information that is irrelevant to our present occupation and only take in those that are valid and helpful. 2. preoccupation – Listening to all sorts of things all at the same time is but waste of our time. We can’t multi-task at listening. Like in- talking to someone while checking on a phone message while watching news on television- certainly, information gaps occur somewhere in between and failure to accurately understand information and do responsive action happen. Not only do we fail in listening and responding, we may also offend the person we are talking to because of our preoccupation. Paying attention is very important. 3. rapid thoughts – Our brain has the ability to associate topics similar to what we hear. When listening to a lecture we tend to veer away from the speaker’s topic and ponder on rapid thoughts that are related to the topic. We then lose focus in listening. We have to control our rapid thoughts in order to stay in focus and listen effectively. 4. lack of effort – We have to put a good effort at listening. When in conversation, we have to be in proper body position and keep constant eye contact to the one we are listening to. We have to put in energy in listening as a way to control attention span. 5. external noise – We have to consciously veer away from distracting noise in order to listen effectively. We have to control noise and be close to the person we are listening to. 6. faulty assumptions – It is difficult to really understand the person we are listening to if we allow our faulty assumptions and prejudices on the person talking or on what he is talking about get in the way. We have to set-aside perceptions to be able to focus at listening. 7. lack of apparent advantage – We tend to lost interest in listening about things we deem unimportant to us and won’t benefit us in any way. In order to listen effectively, we have to set-aside out egoistic tendencies and humbly hear others’ ideas. 8. lack of training – Being a bad listener is not permanent.One can always train at listening effectively by consciously doing it at all times. Listening skills can be honed. It can be developed and perfected over time with conscious effort and constant practice.
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Photos used under Creative Commons from www.ilmicrofono.it, Alexandre Dulaunoy, grenade